Bit of my Crazy drab Life i live, I can not pretend to be Happy all the time and Amazon has its share in it.

While i was nesting during my pregnancy, I would spend hours to search for the right items to use before my baby  would arrive. I am so glad with some of the useful baby items that i got from Amazon, and still using them today . I would get so happy every time i would order something from Amazon and it would arrive the same day i ordered it . The item just not come like that but it would come with a joy and a smile to put on my face. Since then, I started buying things from Amazon. First, i feel secure and second they have gained my trust by delivering my items the day they have always told me at the time of purchasing.

   As soon as i found out i was pregnant i got super excited to welcome this bundle of joy in my plain boring life. To be honest, my life was really quiet and boring before my  3rd baby, i almost forgot how to laugh. Apparently my life was pitch perfect ideal according to others. Married with 2 kids,  9 to 5 office job and living in a dream house that i always wanted. Of course its not paid off. I am not being ungrateful but i was not feeling that joy. My life was only surrounded by my work, coming home, getting chores done quickly and rushing to the bed to get up on time next morning to reach at work. Every single day driving back to home, i would ask myself why am not happy, what am i missing in my life. I have a job, i have a house, i have kids then what was it. I would cry every time coming home asking god to "give me joy for once, i really want to feel how happiness is like". I just wanted to feel it before i am gone. I did not feel happy at all in my life and i was tired pretending it. I was going by  the saying " fake it till you make it" but it was not happening in my case. 

   I was just going on and on every single day  like this until this one day when i started wondering about my  missing periods for more than 3  weeks. It did not cross my mind that i could ever be pregnant unless my doctor would help me. Because with the condition like PCOS, i just thought this could never happen. Well, i was not sure.But when a lot of days passed and i started feeling more hungry than usual. I got little concerned that something must have gone wrong with my PCOS. I was also feeling nauseous in the morning. So, I thought its a good idea to check and find out if i was pregnant.  I had a very old pregnancy test sitting in my bathroom cabinet for no obvious reason but it was there. I came home early from work one afternoon and checked. That very moment I FELT the ray of happiness for once after how long i can't remember. To be Continued....

Thank you for reading. I am not a very good writer but i can try to reveal some more about my Crazy drab life with the conditions like Anxiety, Pcos and IBS. And how life is like when you suffer from these conditions and go by your days.
Please let me know if you want me to write more? Comment below if you have built a slight interest in bit of my crazy life. I would appreciate little bit of encouragement in expressing my self with the help of yours. And  I will shed some light on my life with Pcos.